Alex sent me a mac laptop for Christmas, escalating a string of gifts over the last few months to something that made me really uncomfortable. The ... economic disparity, I suppose, makes it look like there's something there that isn't there. An implied sexual relationship -- where society sees an uneven status between two people, it's assumed that there is something else equalizing things.

I spent a good chunk of the evening tearing into him. I actually put ultimatums on our continued friendship, of a nature I would never have believed of myself a few years ago: Don't send me any presents. Don't give me any gifts.

Because as much as he claims he sent this expensive, inappropriate gift with no strings attached, there ARE strings attached--the expectation that I will be grateful (for a gift I can't use), the expectation that I will not be uncomfortable or feel the disparity in our financial situations.

I do like presents. I like giving them and I like getting them. I love seeing the look on someone's face when I have found the perfect present and they get the thrill of getting just what they want whether they knew it or not. I like just as much having that feeling when opening a present.

But gifts should come not only from the heart but from a history of friendship. Gifts should be a way to show love, sure, but in a way that is measure for measure. Any situation where that isn't the case, there is something else going on below the surface (good or bad). Gifts shouldn't feel like charity, or a bribe, or a way of ingratiating oneself into another's good graces.

...

I hope we're friends. I hope we talk a lot, and I hope it's the kind of thing that I'd be willing to do for you--that I'd be glad to spend this much money or time or creativity on you.

So I guess what I'm saying is that I'm grateful... that you found a way to give without strings attached. Don't get me wrong; I still want to know who you are. But maybe you know that you shouldn't be spending that kind of money on me. And if that's the case, then I'm glad you did it this way.

...


(But I still want to know who you are.)

No idea. NO IDEA. Nobody that I would think of could afford it anyway.



So, in fiction (in no particular order):

George Weasley
Dr. Horrible (Billy)
Havelock Vetinari
Edward Cullins *giggle*
Angel
Logan Echolls
Tobias
Ninth Doctor
Mr. Darcy
Michael East

Well, according to Roy I have lots of clues, but no idea how to put them together.


Crush this person!
Get your own ThisCrush.com CrushTag!

Who the hell is doing this!??!?!

And this just proves it....



Now the only question is: What do I mean by "proves"?

Okay, I admit that I have lately lost track of the time that passes. With the extra work and activities, time flies by and before I know it, it's been weeks or months since I've posted.

This should work to your advantage, TSA, whoever you are, except for the one measure I have of the time between "incidents."

You see, Roy is fascinated and amused by these episodes, and a great part of my entertainment from this whole situation comes from sharing the Adventures With Secret Admirer with him. He is patient enough to let me run through every scenario and go over every detail, all the while chuckling in enjoyment at my exasperation/anticipation/frustration.

So if you don't play, then the fun dries up.

Either do something, or fess up.

Steve:

Reasons it might be him:

He's married, so it would have to be a secret.
He likes me kind of.
These things from TSA tend to come when he has a lot of free time.
He denies involvement.

Reasons it's probably not him:

He's married.
He likes me but I don't think he LIKES me.
He's not that sneaky.
He denies involvement.

Gregory:

Reasons it could be him:

I already know he likes me.
He knows I'm not interested in him "in that way," so he might want to be sneaky.
He has a romantic side.
He denies involvement.

Reasons he is unlikely:

I already know he likes me.
He knows I'm not interested in him "in that way," so he might not want to throw his money away.
He gets "a bit touchy" when the subject comes up.
He denies involvement.

Randall Munroe:

Reasons it could be him:

I started reading xkcd and left him a note about my crush on him very shortly before receiving the first package.
He sent me a note on Valentine's day. (Incidentally.)
The one official hint I have, that says it's not him, could be a LIE!
It would be AWESOME.

Reasons it's probably not him:

The one official hint I have says it's not him.
He has no idea who I am.
It turns out wanting something doesn't make it real. (No matter how elaborately you fool yourself.)

Anybody who tells me anything new about this IP address will have my undying gratitude.

199.212.17.130

I'm pretty sure it's billing address guy's IP, which is LAME, but I still want to know anything other than this profile:

http://rave.ca/?s=member&u=Bassic

And Canada.

Jon:

Reasons why he is likely:

I already know he likes me, at least kind of.
He would get a total kick out of mind games like this.
He knew my old address and might not have known about me moving to my new address at the time the first package was sent.
He denies involvement.

Reasons why he is unlikely:

I already know he likes me, at least kind of.
I think he likes another girl more.
He is really poor.
He denies involvement.

Roy... I don't really think so. But in the interest of fairness:

Roy:

Reasons it might be him:

He often wishes it was him.
He gets waaaay too much enjoyment out of the mindfuck I'm experiencing.
He is human, and he knows me, so it's possible.

Reasons it probably isn't him:

He often wishes it was him.
He's got this crazy/romantic/vomit-inducing relationship going on.
It's just not likely at all, is it?!

Brian

Reasons why he is likely:

I already know he likes me.
He lives far away.
He's sweet and romantic.
He denies involvement.

Reasons why he is unlikely:

I already know he likes me.
The timing of the message I got today rules him out, unless someone other than TSA left the message.
He's really poor.
He denies involvement.

I forgot that on Valentine's Day I got an email from Randall Munroe, answering my question about the Blue Eyes Puzzle on the xkcd website.

This fuels my belief that he just might be, or have been at one time, my secret admirer. And... and... and he was just WAITING to answer until Valentine's Day. Even though it wasn't anything romantic. Or remotely admirative. But I think I just made a word up about it.

So maybe he didn't miss Valentine's Day. Maybe he gave me a clue! Maybe it's Randall! That would be bizarre. But amazing.

But maybe it isn't.

And there hasn't been anything since then.

That I know of. I guess.

Okay, give me some kind of sign.

Otherwise, I'll just let it go.

One last stop.

One last time.

One last try.

Otherwise, out of order.

What, you missed Valentine's day?

What kind of secret admirer are you, anyway?

...

Just asking....

So... my little plan didn't work. Those flowers from last week? Well, they were delivered to work, like I said, but that was just a normal thing that happens on Friday. They weren't for me.

But come on, NO reaction at all? No, "Hey, wait, those aren't from me?!" No, "Hey, I know what you're up to!"

Alas, nothing. Not hide nor hair.

SIGH.

A HUGE bouquet was just delivered to me at work. It's got pink carnations, and white daisies, and some other stuff I don't even know what to call. The guy who delivered it was kind of confused. A little early for Valentine's day I guess. :P

Seriously it's gigantic. At least three feet tall and two feet wide. Gi-normous.

When?